Spiritual Friendship: Learning to Be Friends with God and One Another

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Spiritual Friendship

their experiences and perceptions. 38 While many in the world despair that these kinds of friendships are possible, Scripture and the testimony of believers from previous generations offers hope. Aelred discusses the challenge of being a friend to those to whom he is both “boss” and pastor (3.114−118). His stories and example show that it is possible for a pastor and members of the congregation to be deep spiritual friends (3.119−127). A more recent example is described by John Perkins, an African American pastor and community leader, who became friends with Tommy Tarrants. Tommy was a former Ku Klux Klan member responsible for bombing many churches and synagogues, but who eventually came to know the forgiveness and grace of Jesus. After describing their current friendship, Perkins asks, “Why would we want to go to heaven where every tribe and every tongue will be worshiping together at the feet of our God if we don’t want to be friends with everyone [all cultures] now?” 39 If you have persevered this far, you are well equipped to continue the journey of spiritual friendship. The pursuit of spiritual friendship is not without danger, but it is a reliable means of grace whereby we are drawn into greater friendship with the triune God. Those who have studied the art of friendship know that the friend of my friend is also my friend. For believers who are friends with Jesus, we have also received the wonderful privilege of meeting his spiritual friends from every culture and generation. Dana Robert is correct when she writes, “Friendship with

38 Robert, Faithful Friendships , 188−90. 39 John M. Perkins and Karen Waddles, He Calls Me Friend: The Healing Power of Friendship in a Lonely World (Chicago: Moody, 2019), 138−39.