Spiritual Friendship: Learning to Be Friends with God and One Another

24

Spiritual Friendship

something on your mind, but you are afraid of the crowd, and desire privacy. 3. IVO: Yes, that’s quite right, and I am very glad, since I know you care for me like a son. It must be the spirit of Christian love—no other—that has revealed my state of mind to you. And I wish that your regard for me would allow me this one favor: as often as you visit your spiritual children here, let me have you all to myself just once, apart from the others, so I can pour forth the turmoil of my heart without fear. 4. AELRED: I’ll grant you that favor, and willingly! I am delighted to see that you are not given to arguing about empty and idle matters, but you are always engaged in some beneficial pursuit, something necessary to your spiritual development. So speak out without fear, and share all your cares and thoughts with a friend; so you may both learn and teach, give and receive, pour out your own soul but, at the same time, take in the soul of another. 5. IVO: Indeed, I was prepared to learn, not to teach—not to give, but to receive, to pour out my own soul rather than to partake of yours. This is demanded by our respective ages; moreover, my lack of learning compels it, and my vows urge me to this end. But I do not wish to waste time foolishly on these matters when it is needed for other things: I want you to teach me something about spiritual friendship. I want to know its nature, its usefulness, the principle upon which it is founded, its end, whether all people are capable of it or what sort of people attain it, if not everybody can indeed, how is it possible to preserve Christian Friendship Is Better than Cicero’s Friendship (1.5−10)