Spiritual Friendship: Learning to Be Friends with God and One Another

Chapter 4: The Advantages and Excellence of Spiritual Friendship (Book 2.28–72)

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The Great Joy of Spiritual Friendship Requires Suffering (2.49) 49. AELRED: Cicero spoke well about such opinions of friendship: “They seem to take the sun out of the universe when they deprive life of friendship, because we have received nothing better, nothing more pleasant” from God than friendship. 9 What sort of wisdom is it to hate friendship so that you may avoid anxiety, leave cares behind, throw off fear—as though any virtue can be acquired or maintained without anxiety? And even in your own case, does prudence do battle with error, or temperance with desire, or justice with malice, or courage with cowardice, without causing you a great deal of trouble? 50. Who, I wonder, especially among teenagers, is strong enough to protect his sexual purity, or to rein in his lusting affections, without the greatest concern and fear? viii Paul must have been a fool then, since he did not wish to live without care and concern for others, but rather with a view of Christian love, which he considered the greatest virtue, he was weak with the weak and he burned with desire along with those who were tempted ( 2 Cor 11:28−29 ). But he had great sadness and continual grief in his heart for his brothers according to the flesh ( Rom 9:2−3 ). 51. Therefore he should have abandoned his Christian love, so he would not have to live under the burden of so many fears and griefs: now bringing to birth a second The Examples of the Apostle Paul and of David’s Friend, Hushai (2.50−53)

9 Ibid., 13.47.