Spiritual Friendship: Learning to Be Friends with God and One Another

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Spiritual Friendship

80. In the state of happiness there is no concealment of thoughts, no dissimulation of affection. This is what true and eternal friendship is: it takes shape here, in this world, and is perfected in the next; here it is the property of the few who are good; there, where all are good, it is the property of all. Here, where the wise and foolish are mingled together, a time of testing is necessary; there, friends need no testing, since they have been blessed by a certain angelic and (so to speak) divine perfection. Therefore, after this example, let us unite with friends whom we love just as we love ourselves, all of whose affairs are revealed to us, to whom we in turn reveal all of our own secrets; those who are steadfast and stable and constant in all things should be our friends. Do you think that any mortal does not wish to be loved? WALTER: I don’t think so. 81. AELRED: If you saw someone who lived with many other people, but was suspicious of them all, as though he feared they were plotting against his life, and thought no one loved him, would you not consider this man most wretched? WALTER: I would consider him most wretched indeed. AELRED: So also you will not deny that the man who is dear to the hearts of those with whom he lives, who loves all and is loved by all, who enjoys the sweetest tranquility and therefore is not riven by suspicion or struck by fear— surely you will agree that this is the happiest man? WALTER: You have spoken most excellently and truly.