Spiritual Friendship: Learning to Be Friends with God and One Another

Chapter 4 The Advantages and Excellence of Spiritual Friendship (Book 2.28–72)

Chapter Summary If your friend decides to do something sinful, should you support them or challenge them? In this chapter we will find Aelred’s answer to this and many other questions. When the last chapter concluded, Aelred had been explaining the nature of spiritual friendship using the example of three kinds of kisses. In this chapter, Aelred continues the conversation by answering a question from Walter about how far one should go for friendship (2.29−32). Aelred explains that true friends are willing to die for one another (2.33−36), and he explains that we do not have to be perfect to start on the journey of spiritual friendship (2.37−44). Pursuing true friendship is costly, however, and we should not be afraid to suffer for friendship because the pain is worth the gain (2.45−53).

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