Healing the Wounds of Trauma

comforters are you all!” (Job 16.2, NIV). Rather than comforting Job, they increased his pain.

❂❂ SMALL GROUP DISCUSSION What things did Job’s comforters do or say that were helpful? What things did they do or say that were not helpful?

B. How can we help people who are grieving? ❂❂ SMALL GROUP DISCUSSION

1. When you have been mourning the loss of someone, what sort of helpful things have people done or said? What sort of unhelpful things have been done or said? 2. How does your culture traditionally help those who mourn? What customs are helpful? Which ones are not helpful? Are there any that would not be good for a Christian to do? Why? Report back to the large group. Add anything below that has not already been mentioned. Some traditional ceremonies and practices help a person grieve; oth- ers do not. Church leaders should encourage those ceremonies which are helpful and are in keeping with the Christian faith. In addition to these things, other ways to help a person grieve include: • Visit them. Pray for them (Eph 6.18). • When they are ready, encourage them to talk about how they feel. Allow them to express their anger and sadness. • Listen to their pain. Do more listening than talking. Healing will come as they let the pain out. They cannot absorb teaching and sermons at this time (Job 21.2; Pr 18.13). • Help them with practical things. If a grieving person has to worry about caring for themselves and their families, they will not have energy tomournproperly and recover.Theymight be too exhausted to do the work they did before, much less to do all the things the deceased person did. Relieve themof their regular responsibilities so that they can grieve. Especially at the time of the funeral and

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What Happens When Someone Is Grieving?